(no subject)

[frelling_tralk]

I'm kind of over this "tone argument" tbh. I was always brought up to believe that, however angry or upset someone makes you, the way you choose to speak to them in response does matter

Comments

[next_to_normal]

Yeah, I know what you mean. I think there is definitely value in recognizing that complaints about tone are used as a way to dismiss minority viewpoints, but it seems as though it's become a free pass to be hostile and even sometimes downright cruel to people you disagree with. Verbally abusing someone and then claiming "tone argument!" when they call you out on it is NOT OKAY.

No one is saying you HAVE to be polite, but... it's not a bad idea to try, you know? "You catch more flies with honey" is a famous saying for a reason.

[frelling-tralk.livejournal.com]

Exactly, I do appreciate that the tone argument can very easily be used to derail a legitimate grievance that someone may have, but now it seems to have almost become a free pass to talk to people however you want

[sum1-different.livejournal.com]

Behaving in a civilized manner is always called for unless you're dealing with someone who has personally wronged you (and even then there are limits). Just because someone has a legit grievance with society or whatever doesn't justify them acting like an asshole. There's quite enough of people treating each other like shit in the world without encouraging more of it. And using victim status to justify treating one's fellow human beings like shit is just pathtic. And I say that as somebody who knows what it's like to be a victim.

[sum1-different.livejournal.com]

["Behaving in a civilized manner is always called for unless you're dealing with someone who has personally wronged you"]

Confronting people who have behaved in a bigoted manner or have done some other sort of wrong is certainly ok, but that doesn't justify calling everything bigotry.