Joss talks about deliberately going for Kennedy as the opposite of Tara, and I think she very much was in terms of arrogant nasty personality, but you're right that it seems all of Willow's lovers must worship her. It's like the writers find it impossible to imagine that she might actually have to be the one chasing someone. Oz and Tara were both all over her from the first, "No you are special. Here, take this priceless articifact of my family's"


Well she never got anywhere with Xander mind you, but that was the only exception from what I remember.